real intent...

The young teacher studies the faces of her three students, certain that they are bored with the material and are only being quiet due to the promise of a treat at the end of the lesson. She recites the principles of the lesson she has studied from the manual, asking questions of the children, trying to read in their eyes if they're getting it.

This isn't working, she thinks quietly, I'm not saying the right thing.

And so she lets go of the plan -- the manual no longer matters. Her topic no longer matches the outline, and the tie-in to the lesson plan is a stretch.

But it works.

She bears her testimony of the Holy Ghost, sharing stories of when she has been protected, guided, comforted, even corrected -- that "if we keep the commandments, and promise to remember the Savior, we will always have the Spirit to be with us."

She watches as each child smiles, saying nothing. They look at each other, and back at her.

"Does that make sense?" the teacher asks the children, praying that something clicked.

"Yes," the three children say together.

To demonstrate her understanding, one of the children brings up a time when her parents where helped by the Holy Ghost to make a decision.

"Exactly!" the teacher responds, "That's exactly right."

They got it, she thinks, ecstatic, they got something.

Then, seemingly out of nowhere, the little girl in the class clears her throat.

"You shouldn't get married yet, teacher."

The teacher is surprised at the out of nowhere statement, and asks, "Oh? Why not?"

The children look at each other for a moment, and one of the little boys answers, "Because you need to go on your mission first." As he speaks, the other two children nod in agreement, silently but emphatically seconding his reason.

Still surprised and wondering how this came about, the teacher asks a second question, "A mission? Really?"

All three students say, "YES," together, firm and clear.

She is puzzled -- her students telling her she needs to go on a mission. Why would they think that? she wonders quietly. And in her curiosity, she timidly asks a third question, bracing herself for whatever response will be given.

"Do you think I'd be a good missionary?"

Again, the children look to each other before answering. The little boy who spoke before shrugs and says, "That depends."

The teacher laughs a little, "Depends on what?"

She is met with three solemn stares, gazes serious and sincere. Her eyes are caught by the little girl, who studies her face before speaking.

"Depends on why you're going."

"you weren't alone for long..."

Every once in awhile one of my primary students will say something that leaves me speechless. Sometimes I'm amazed at the sincerity of what they're saying, and the absolute truth in it. I often find myself so grateful for their insights. Many times I wish I could go back to that time, when the world was untainted by the worries and cares I have now, before trust was broken and fear set in.

My class has four students -- three boys, one girl. Sophie is a precocious, talkative, practical little thing. She always has something to say, and she knows many of the scripture stories as well as or better than I do. She also has a very clear picture of life and love. Sometimes the things she says shock me, not in a bad way but in a surprised and "wow, you're seven and you just totally blew my mind" kind of way. For example:

During our lesson today (love one another), I told a story about a time when someone did me a kindness and reminded me that even though I felt alone, the Lord was still aware of me. Sophie raised her hand and said she had something to share. I don't remember the exact words, but it went something like this:

"Even when you feel alone, you're really not. Like the time when my mom accidentally left me at the library. I was so scared and I cried and cried and cried, but then I remembered all of the other times I'd been lost. Any time I'd been lost before, I hadn't been lost for long. My mom always came and found me -- it might have been five minutes, or two, or even just thirty seconds -- but she always found me again. And it's okay to cry, because that happens when you're alone and lost and scared, but just because you feel that way doesn't mean that you're not loved. You're never lost for long. When you feel like that, you can remember the times you felt sad or scared before and how it wasn't forever. You weren't alone for long. Because someone will always come and find you."

It's not often that the words of a seven year old can leave me speechless and near tears -- it was one of those little miracle moments that come around when you least expect them, and when you need them the most.

awkward, funny, what?

From college:

Guy in my Humanities class: "You just like the Sherlock series because of his curly dark hair. All the girls love that."
Reply: "No. I just like the way he holds his gun."

Stats professor: "I should never ask questions on Monday mornings."

Humanities professor: "You can't disagree with a General Authority. That's starting an argument with God!"

From family:

Amanda: "So we were talking about Afrighanistan in class yesterday..."
Interuption: "Afrighanistan? Do you mean Afghanistan?"
Amanda: "What, you mean I've been saying it wrong my entire life?!"

Amanda: "Whenever I squish a Skittle it turns into a shape like an FUO...wait...no! I meant UFO!"

And last but not least...

From Primary:

Little girl talking about how excited her little brother is that her mom is going to have another little boy...finally: "Now he won't be the lone man in the garden of estrogen."

6-year-old boy: "I don't want to get married."
Another 6-year-old boy: "Yeah. It looks stupid. All that work for dumb kids like us. Adults are crazy."

church and state...

I had some pretty good laughs in Sharing Time today. I swear, kids say the cutest things. It makes me glad that I get to be a Primary teacher.

Teacher displaying a picture of an apostle on the board: "Who is this a picture of?"
Little girl: "Abraham Lincoln."

Actually...it was Boyd K. Packer. Good try, hon!

Teacher: "Who is the president?"
Little boy: "Obama is, but we better get Romney this time."

She meant the president of the church, but considering the little guy's parents, it's an easy mistake to make. Chip off the old block, he is, haha!

Music leader: "Do you have a question?"
Little girl: "No, I just wanted to point out that I noticed that in the first two lines of this song, the last two words, well...they're homophones. 'Hear' and 'here.' See it?"

Yay for grammar lessons!

kid stuff...

Another great Primary lesson today. We talked about how children can be missionaries through keeping the commandments and being good examples for their friends, families, and neighbors. Sophie made an interesting point. I'm paraphrasing, but here's the gist of it:

"There's a difference between knowing you should do something and acting what you know you should do. Like, if you tell somebody to read their scriptures but you're not reading your scriptures, it isn't as good. So being a good example means you don't just say stuff that's good, you do the stuff that's good. If you don't, then you're not a good example. You're just sort of faking it and people think you're awesome but you're not. It's a big difference."

Moments like that make me happy. She gets it. And it also makes me think, remind me how old...oh, right. You're seven. As of about a month ago. *pleasantly surprised head shake*

One of the things we talked about doing was supporting the Elders out in the mission field by writing them letters and giving them encouragement. Each child wrote a letter or drew a picture for some of the missionaries from our ward.

Putting the letters into envelopes and applying stamps was interesting. Most of the kids had never seen a stamp, which in retrospect isn't that big of a surprise. They were very intrigued by them.

Primary boy: "That's not a stamp, it's a sticker!"
Me: "No, it's not a sticker. It's called a stamp, and it's used to pay the post office to mail your letter."
Primary boy: "They get paid in stickers?! Not fair!!"

Who'da thunk, huh?

Sharing Time was also quite fun. The Primary president had a matching game for part of her lesson. There were pictures of prophets and apostles mounted on orange paper on one side of the board and pieces of paper with their names on the other side. The kids had to help each other match the pictures to the name tags. One little girl, Ella, was selected to turn over a picture to see whose face was on the other side. She got up to the board and just stood there, frowning. The Primary president asked her to turn over a picture and Ella said no. When asked why, she responded "I don't like any of those colors."

Orange is Ella's least favorite color. It's "Ew."

Quite an enjoyable Sunday meeting block.

sweet kids...

Sometimes I don't like teaching primary. Those are the days when I feel super exhausted from being busy all week, and I can barely get out of bed let alone handle the energy of four very intelligent six-year-olds. Those days when I feel inadequate and worry that no matter how I present a lesson I'm not making a difference for the kids at all. Those are the days when I cannot for the life of me get the kids to sit in their chairs, let alone be quiet and reverent.

Other days I love teaching primary. Those are the days when I still feel all of the things I feel on not so good days, but they are also the days when the lesson goes well. The days when the kids remember what we talked about, and each of them raised their hands multiple times to participate, and each one of them behaved for the most part.

Those are also the days when they say really funny/cute things that make me burst into laughter on the inside while at the same time marveling at how smart they are. For example:

Primary boy one: "I want to draw a picture of people kicking and punching each other!"
Primary boy two: "No. Jesus would get mad at us."

Hilariously precious, right?

Primary teacher (me) showing a picture: "Who can tell me who this is?"
Primary boy: "IT'S JESUS!"
Primary girl: "Preston, you're not even looking at the picture. It's not Jesus, it's a kid with a horse." *looking at me and rolling her eyes* "Boys are so weird."
I agree, Sophie.

Primary teacher (me): "What do you think we're going to talk about today?"
Primary boy: "Choose the right. Because we always talk about choose the right every single lesson every year. It's like they think we haven't figured it out yet or something."

Oh, snap.

And just so you know, Preston: I felt exactly the same way when I was a six-year-old.

start of something new...

Last week I went on a date and bought a book of recipes. I have to admit I am now a little more excited about the book than the date; Sean and I are great friends, and we have fun together, BUT! The book is a recipe for cake bites. There are 101 recipes in this book. What is NOT exciting about cake bites?!

This book came home with me and keeps me occupied for hours at a time. For example: I like to read through the different recipes and make plans as to when I can make something new and when I can purchase the ingredients I don't have. I'm creating a kind of schedule for special ones to try, especially since the holidays are coming up and I want to be able to make some for my family/close friends. These little treats are so much fun to make! You don't even have to do them all in one day, which is awesome.

I've only made one batch so far, and now that I know what I did wrong I expect to be able to do much better in the future! I didn't make any super huge mistakes--the cake bites are very much edible and very, very cute. I know now though that it's best to use only the amount of frosting that the recipe calls for (one cup as opposed to all three), that chocolate really will melt on low (patience!), and that it is best to freeze cake bites on a cookie sheet that is covered in wax paper to keep the cakes from sticking to or staining the pan (oops).

Here are my little Halloween ghosties! Feast your eyes on these (mint chocolate cake bites shaped like ghosts, dipped in melted vanilla flavored almond bark and decorated with glitter black and orange edible gel):



I also spent the week getting a treat ready for my primary students. I wanted to do something special for them since it's a Halloween holiday weekend, so I went to the local Dollar Tree and stocked up on items to fill a few Halloween goodie bags. They turned out way better than I expected them to! It was so much fun to put these together. Picking out the items and making each bag was very happy making. The kids were all so good today! I don't know if that's because I'm finally getting this teaching thing, or if it was the bribery...

primary...

I teach primary in my home ward. I'm part of the junior primary, with ages 3 through 8 years old. Working with the kids is so super fun. They're all so bright and happy and lovely, with such an innocence and a thirst to learn. Yes, sometimes they get bored and wiggly and it can really drive me crazy, but each week I teach it becomes more of a joy. Not to mention that the kidlets are so stinkin' hilarious! They're so cute! For example. Today in singing time we were learning a song about prayer. Here's the story:

Primary music leader: "What is an important part of prayer? Can you tell me? It starts with an 'F' ".
Child 1: "Uhhhhh...FISH!"
Child 2: "Well, no. No, not fish."

The word they were looking for was faith, but when you're 4 that's kind of a tricky word and concept to grasp. Fish just makes more sense, I suppose!

After singing time, I take my students to our classroom and we have a lesson on a principle of the gospel (see LDS.org for further information). My class is the 7 turning 8 year-olds, and it seems that every single week I get a new student. I started out with 9 children, 7 of whom came frequently. I am now up to 13 on my roll, with 10 or 11 who come on a regular basis. I have the biggest primary class in the junior and senior primary, and I teach by myself. For an almost 20-year-old, never had any children college student, it's quite the undertaking! It's especially difficult when one or two of the boys in class decide that they don't want to participate, and that because they don't they're going to be rowdy and disrupt everyone else. That's hard. Sometimes I feel like I spend more time disciplining than I do teaching.

Despite the challenge, I find that the more students I have in the class, the more I love to teach them. Each child has so much to offer! Every single one of them has such an interesting view of the world, and if given a chance, each one will open up and share their perspective. I learn something new from the kids every week. It's fascinating, exhilarating, and continually gives me hope for the world and for myself. Here's a story about one of the boys:

Today in primary we were talking about how to stay pure, and what kind of things influence us. We were using salt and pepper to decide whether things were pure or not; I showed the children a handful of pure salt, and then added pepper to it to make it "dirty" and impure. Pretty soon the terms to describe somethings purity were like this: "Hm...yeah, that movie is salty. It's okay to watch that one!" or "Well, this game is kind of violent, so I suppose it's more peppery."

We spent several minutes discussing different types of entertainment, and rating them on their salty or peppery content. The next part of the lesson was to talk about personal heroes. I asked the kids to think of their hero and to decide whether or not their chosen hero was a good one. After all of the questions I asked about a hero, such as "Does your hero swear?" and "Does your hero keep the law at all times?" one of the boys said, "Yeah...my hero matches that. Because my hero isn't from a movie or a book or a game or a TV show. My hero is my mom."

Does that just make your heart melt?! Good heavens, I actually teared up a little bit when he said that. The look on his face--he totally adores his mom.

I also teared up when two of my girls came to talk to me for a bit. One of them commented that I was helping her and the other students be pure because I was teaching them how to live the gospel. Then she came up to where I was standing at the front of the room and started playing with my braid (my hair is really long for her to be able to reach it!) and said, "And she's really pretty and she's smart and she always makes sure we're happy and learning good things." Then at the end of the lesson, another little girl brought me a picture she'd drawn on the back of the CTR (Choose the Right) handout I had for the kids. "Look! It's a picture of you, teacher, all in red because of your jacket and look, here's the book you always hold! I'm going to take it home and put it on my fridge so I can see you every day!"

*choked up*

Having a child to love is such an incredible blessing. When you get to watch them grow and learn, and you get to be a part of their lives...it's one of the greatest things that you could ever imagine. These kids aren't mine, but I love them as if they were! And being loved in return by a child...wow. That is pure, true, salty love, without a bit of pepper in it!