Love your story, Georgie. Such a contrast between the two older women. And you fill in their characters nicely with the dialogue. It's true; lasting beauty lies within us.
Good luck! I'm chairing Reflections in my kids school right now. I think the theme is gonna produce some awesome entries like yours.
I loved the personalities of the people--I was shocked by how wonderfully it was writen.
You did say you wanted a little bit of feed back so I'll say I L-O-V-E-D it. there is just one little thing I'd do. After the whole array of objects in the chest, there was a "were there." I would subtract that but I aint' a editor:)
5 comments:
Love your story, Georgie. Such a contrast between the two older women. And you fill in their characters nicely with the dialogue. It's true; lasting beauty lies within us.
Good luck! I'm chairing Reflections in my kids school right now. I think the theme is gonna produce some awesome entries like yours.
If you need to cut something, I'd say you don't really need to talk about Vera.
I thought that was great! You really made me want to keep reading it. Good job.
-FringeGirl
Loved it!!!!!!!!!!!!
IT WAS GREAT!!!!!!!!!!!!
I loved the personalities of the people--I was shocked by how wonderfully it was writen.
You did say you wanted a little bit of feed back so I'll say I
L-O-V-E-D it. there is just one little thing I'd do. After the whole array of objects in the chest, there was a "were there." I would subtract that but I aint' a editor:)
I noticed that, Coleman. Thanks for pointing it out. :)
Thanks, everyone!
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