Monday, April 18, 2011

speaking of JAR OF HEARTS...

My song for the day is JAR OF HEARTS. I just reread the post I wrote a over the weekend (because I don't have time during the week so I scheduled the songs out in advance). Talk about appropriate! I ran into my friend who I had a kinda sorta break up with (we're going back to calling him Aries, his star sign). It was awkward, uncomfortable, embarrassing, all of the above and more. Apparently he figured out from the way I acted that I'm still pretty upset about what happened. I hate to stay upset about things, but this is really hard. It's hard to be a friend to someone and then to feel completely unable to trust them.

Aries texted me this morning, asking what he'd done. Basically it confirmed what I already know about him, and I don't want to have to deal with this. To be honest, I'm afraid of him. He knows exactly how I work, and he knows how to use that to his advantage. He's proud of it, too.

JAR OF HEARTS wise, I can't go back. I trust him about as much as I trust a rattlesnake with two heads and no rattle: you never know which one is going to strike, and there's no sound to warn you of what's coming.

Happy update: I baked a cake today!! I've found that baking and cooking help me feel better when I'm upset. I rarely eat what I make, but it's nice to make things for other people. My little best fwend (Jason and Jordan's little sister) picked out a cake mix and she "helped" me at her house with it. I hope it turned out all right, and I hope they like it! They liked the last one. The boys are still talking about it, and it's been over two weeks since I made that cake. You know something was really good if a boy remembers eating it two weeks ago and still talks about it. Usually they just move on to the next meal. I can't figure out how they can eat so much and stay fit. They're so lucky!

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